All about Minimizing

Thursday, March 29, 2012

First and second negative reaction, all in one day

Let me start by saying that I am VERY open about my surgery, all of my family and friends know and support my decision.  Until yesterday no one said anything negative, not to my face at least.  My job has three different buildings and I very rarely venture out of my building, but yesterday I had a presentation to give in another location.  While I was there I ran into a guy that I started at this company with 6 years ago.  He and I have always been friendly and talk when we see each other but are not close.  While we were talking I asked him if he was losing weight and he told me he has lost 30lbs through WW.  I congratulated him and asked him how that was going.  Then he asked me the same thing, had I lost weight.  I think I am down about 15lbs since I last saw him so I said yes and this liquid diet is probably helping!  He asked about that and I told him about the upcoming surgery.  Then he got this horrified look on his face and said "Don't you think that is a bit extreme?"  I said that I had done a lot of research and been working for it since June of last year so I really feel like it's the right decision for me.  He proceeded to tell me about his wife's aunt that got Lapband and lost 30lbs in the first two months then put it all back on plus some.  I said that everyone's journey is different and it all depends on how you use it.  Then he looked at his watch and said I have to get back to my desk.  "I guess I'll say good luck.  I really hope it works.....for you if not for everyone else that gets it."  

Now a comment like that is just what it takes to get mama's b*tch switch flipped and normally I would have gotten mad and said something that I might regret later.  I managed to keep my work face on though, I smiled, thanked him and wished him luck on his weight loss too.  I was just stunned, I wanted to start throwing out blog names and tell him to do some research!! 

Second negative reaction happened when I again had to venture out to another department, in the third building.  This time I ran into someone that had the Lapband surgery almost 2 years ago.  She is in a department that I never have to deal with so I have never really talked to her before, about work or personal stuff.  But she heard from someone that I was getting the Lapband and she wanted to tell me why it was a mistake.  Before the Lapband she did Ideal Protein for a year and lost 115lbs, then she got the band and stopped losing.  She just told me that it does nothing to help with cravings and you can't eat anything but soup and milkshakes.  I told her that I was sorry she had a hard time of it and asked it she had gone to the doctor about he problems with restriction.  She said that the doctors were worthless.  Then walked away. 

I was seething by the time I got back to my office, in no way did either of these encounters shake my belief that this is the right decision for me.  If anything they awoke a little fire in me to 'show these people how it can be done'.  I don't want to start my journey with anger and an agenda of anything other than my success for me.  So on my jog home I did a little soul searching and found the ability to let it go and hope that they can find the peace they need to be happy, because I am about to start my journey to find my peace.  And I will not fail. 

13 comments:

  1. People are stupid.

    You are doing this for YOU.

    Ignore them.

    :)

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  2. LBG said it perfectly! You are doing this for you and your health. People are insensitive and stupid. You do you, and don't worry about what they say.

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  3. HATERS!!!!! I hate that WLS still has such a negative connotation. You are going to do great.

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  4. These reactions are why I haven't been entirely open about it. The lady who had lapband obviously thought it would be some kind of magic wand that would just "poof" the pounds away. And the other guy is just ignorant. Sounds like you have a good outlook about it all though.

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  5. Yesterday, the day BEFORE I got my surgery is when I started to hear a lot of negative things again. It really puts a damper on it. But I have watched enough youtube and read some amazing blogs to know that I have taken a step in the right direction. Even if it didn't work for Joe's cousins, nephews, aunt's dentist, brother-in-laws daughter... or some such crap.

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  6. Yes - LBG is right! I heard a bunch of of neg stuff right before my surf too - meh...F 'em. The band works - its a tool that you have to manage.

    New Follower - LBG sent me over
    http://athenabandedwarrior.blogspot.com/

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  7. LBG sent me...good luck on Monday!!! I love my band and I am starting my 4th week with it.

    Check out my blog when you get a chance....
    http://victoriasnewlife.blogspot.com/

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  8. Well I'm one who only lost 40 pounds with the Lapband but don't look for any sympathy. Because... I have kept it off. I have another 10-15 to go and if I lose my band it will be game over because after all these years of gain lose gain, it is the best decision I have ever made. And I paid for mine too. In a year the guy on WW will have regained that 30 pounds and you will have lost more. This community of bloggers is wonderful and it is what gave me the support to lose and keep it off. Now in maintenance I have switched to a new blog to just write about my life but I still still keep up with my groupies. So one piece of advice--stay in this blogs and and participate because when you want to throw in the towel, we won't let you. I'm now at

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  9. Wonky Internet--sorry. I'll be following along.

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  10. Hello there! I say "poo poo on the nay sayers

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  11. New follower. :) you know what's right for you!

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  12. New follower, too, sent from LBG!

    Sorry you had to deal with the negativity, but honestly, the first guy's opinion was formed from ignorance, and the second lady's sniping seems to stem from her inability to see the band as a tool that doesn't do the work for you but serves to help you. And um, yeah, the 'all docs are worthless' comment doesn't bode well for her turning that around anytime soon. Glad you were able to work it out in your own mind - yay you!

    Will be sending happy, healthy, healing vibes your way tomorrow - it's your band birthday!!

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