All about Minimizing

Friday, March 23, 2012

Can a lack of chewing be linked to going crazy??

Is it possible that the lack of solids have made me go crazy?  Even crazier than I have been in the past?  I was listening to music at work and the The Rose by Bette Middler came on and so did the water works.  Not like the delicate, enchanting little tears running down my cheek, but like the hysterical sobbing that inevitably leads to my gagging and vomiting.  And when this little lady vomits she vomits, gut wrenching hurls that involve my entire body, Peaches says I sound like I am being skinned alive.  So there I was crying, hurling, making this horrible screaming noise and the song changes (I am wearing ear buds with my Zune) and I am fine.  Oh, it’s Weezer, there is no crying with Weezer, silly girl. 
More proof that I may be going over the edge, I stopped at Albertson’s on my way home today and there was a HUGE jacked up truck in the parking lot and on his back window he had a lovely little decal.  It said:
LIFT IT UP!!  Fat chicks can’t jump. 
I am a pretty outspoken chick, I don’t back down from confrontation but I don’t go out and look for it either.  However that oh so clever little quip flipped the bitch switch in this fat chick, Miss Blanche DuBois was out in all her glory!!   I waited in the parking lot until he came out of the store and went to get in the truck and I approached him with a big smile on my face and my hand out for a shake.  He took it and smiled back, that’s when I told him that I just wanted to know that I was a big supporter of the research being done to cure micro penis and I was praying for him.  The friend that was with him laughed hysterically, but Mr. Making Up For Something With A Giant Ridiculous D-Bag Truck just called me a fat bitch.  I was pretty proud of myself for a second or two, than the realistic Morgan piped in with ‘Why give that guy the power??’  For sh*t sake he has a set of blue, rubber testicles hanging from his trailer hitch.’  Maybe I did give him the power, but the look on his face will bring me joy for months to come!   

Any advice on how to keep my sanity during this liquid stuff would be appreciated.  To my new followers, THANK YOU!!  For those of you I was not previously following, I am now and will get all caught up with your journeys this weekend.

6 comments:

  1. What an ass. I would have loved to have seen the look on his face!

    Sorry to say I have no good advice for you on the whole liquid thing. My surgeon didn't require a pre op diet. I don't know if I could have made it through it...but I wish you the best with it :)

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  2. full liquids were rough for me too...hang in there

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  3. I almost went insane during my liquid diet so I feel ya'!! Wow you are one brave woman. Kinda love you already!!

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  4. It goes quick in the grand scheme of things. I made lots of different soups: butternut squash, wild mushroom, chicken and sweetcorn, pea and mint, leek and potato, spicy red lentil, tomato and red pepper. I froze loads to use after the op and fills too. It did help to still give me tasty food to focus on.

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  5. You almost made me snort greek yogurt out of my nose...! Hang in there on the pre-op honey, it sucks for everyone, but it is SO WORTH IT. I promise. Sending you hugs!!

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  6. I'm reading your Blog while I'm on break at work and I'm laughing so hard that I have tears rolling down my face....

    I'm still pre-op and I have wondered how I'm going to make it through the liquid part of the process without chewing...

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