A little non-band help request......

Soooo....all you ladies out there with kids, I need a little help.  Last fall a family with seven kids moved in next door to us, I personally don't want kids but I do love them.  However, we quickly ran into some problems with these neighbors.  They would pile all their leaves/snow in our driveway, they shot at my cat with a BB gun, they took a package off my porch (I have a super nosy neighbor across the street, she sees everything!!).  After the BB gun and package incidents I went over to talk to the mother, she basically told me to bug off.  Two days later the cops were at my door because someone reported us as hoarders and neglectful to our animals.  Thankfully the cops came in looked at the clean, uncluttered house, chubby, happy puppies and kitties with food, water, a cupboard full of treats, a box full of toys and realized there was no validity.  They apologized profusely and left, going immediately next door to talk to them.  I can only guess they were the ones that called.  After this incident things started to calm down. 

Now that the weather is getting warmer more problems have arisen.  First we started coming home to all these muddy dirty splotches on the side of the house that faces theirs, it seems the kids are crossing a 10 ft tall hedge row to throw mud pies at my house (nosy neighbor saw them do it).  Then they got a trampoline that they put in the side yard (again right next to my house) and they jump and scream on it all evening long.  Now when I say scream, I don't mean a little hoot or holler with glee.  I mean 45 second long ear splitting screams because one or the other is mad, screams so loud that my dog (who never ever ever barks) will start barking.  Yesterday they added a pool, again on the side closest my bedroom window.  This added another place for lots of fighting and SCREAMING!!!  I know from past experience that talking to the parents will not be helpful, but I really can't take the screaming all summer long.  I get up around 5:15-5:30am so I go to bed around 9:30-10:00pm.  They are sometimes out there screaming until 10-11, even on school nights.  My question is, am I just being a horrible person and this is normal kid behavior?  Should I just invest in earplugs and live with it?  I know when I was growing up my parents were big on respect and screaming for the sake of screaming would not have been tolerated, but maybe I am just an old fuddy duddy!!  Anyone with a magic recipe for getting kids to quiet down please send it to me!!   

Another Crazy Weekend

Whew!  Life has been throwing little poop balls at me for four days now!  On Friday about 17sec before I left for the weekend I get a phone call from my manager.  Apparently there was a big project that someone forgot to mention to our department, a project that needed to be ready for print by today at 2:30p.  I spent about 4 extra hours at work on Friday, 5-6 hours working at home on Sat morning, 9 hours on Sunday and was at work at 5:30a on Monday.  After a review meeting on the project yesterday, I spent another 6 hours working from home last night and another early morning and FINALLY we are done!!  I have my life back.

Here are my most recent stats, my boobies are shrinking daily.  I have already started a little savings account for plastic surgery, because mama wants a perky pair of boobies eventually!

Date	Neck	Arm	Bust	Chest	Waist	HD	Hips	Thigh	Calf	Weight
03/05/11	16.75	16	50.25	42	45.5	53	49.25	31.5	17.5	295.5
03/18/12	16.75	14	48.5	40.5	43.25	52.5	48.5	30.25	17.25	263.4
04/01/12	16.5	14	47.5	41.25	42.5	52	47.5	30.25	17	253
04/08/12	16.25	14	47.25	40	41.75	52.25	47.5	29.5	16.75	249.8
04/16/12	16.5	14	46.75	39.5	41	50.5	47	29.25	17	246
04/22/12	16	14.25	46.5	38.5	41	50.5	47	29	16.75	243

Started week two of purees yesterday...and it can't go fast enough!!  I have taken several small liberties this week, like string cheese and cottage cheese.  These are not specifically on my 'approved' list, but I thought they would be ok.  I don't really ever feel physically full anymore, not while I am eating 1/2c at a time.  Any feeling of satisfaction I get from the food lasts about 2-2.5 hours, so I am ready for a fill already!!  FO SHO!!

On a side note...has anyone else discovered the deliciousness that is Downton Abbey?  OMG, hot British guys...yum!!  In the small amount of down time I had this weekend I watched the first season and will start the second sometime this weekend.  Total sexalicious drama!

P.S.

I have gotten a couple comments and emails from soon to be bandsters about my two last two posts.  I just want to make it clear that in NO WAY do I regret getting the band and I don't doubt that I will be successful, even with dealing with this mental crap.  I have never felt more hope or motivation to lose this weight!!  So please, please, please don't let my whining make you re-think your decision.  But honestly it is a battle for me to make the right choices, at this point.

Bandster Hell cont....

I made Peaches take a new route to work this morning, on the normal street we go down 'Fast Food Alley'.  There is a KFC, Wendy's, McDonalds, Taco Bell, Taco Johns, Pizza Hut, Chalet Market (a local sammie shop I LOVE) and Hardees.  I just look at them all and dream.  I am really dieting at this point, I am pretty sure I could fit anything I wanted to into my belly. 

I was talking to Peaches about this and he wanted to know why I am feeling this so much right now.  I had a mini-breakdown when I told him that he was a jerkface skinny jerky jerk and would never understand, I went to my flowerbeds and started digging.  While I was digging I did a lot of thinking and here is my theory....I am feeling sorry for myself.  If I could just have a grilled chicken breast with grilled zuchini, I really think I would not even want the junk.  I just want real food, not food I can eat with a straw!!  Woe is me!!  BUT I still have just over a week on pureed food and then two weeks on soft foods and my surgeon has scared the poop out of me on what could happen if I move too fast.  So I will stay the course, but I can't promise that Blanche won't venture out of her cage....maybe for the entire next month. 

I told Peaches all of this and he let me know he would be staying with his friend Hank for the next month, but would be home on Wed nights to take out the garbage.  Hahaha, he thinks he is soooo funny!!  So, my plan...I went through Narcotic Anonymous when I was 20.  I worked the 12 steps and have been sober for 12yrs  4mnths and 6 days.  I will use the rules for getting sober to get me through this.  One day at a time and if that is too long then one hour or one minute.  After telling Peaches all of this I then had to apologize for flipping my s*it and even though he was not mad, I felt the need to make up.  So I burned more calories!! 

The First Circle of Bandster Hell

The swelling in my tummy has gone down A LOT in the lastr hree days, this means I no longer feel full on the 1/2c of food I am supposed to be eating every four hours.  I WANT MORE!!  I want it! I want it! I want it!  And I don't want more of the super duper proteined up cauliflower puree I made, no I want a freaking hot dog, or a hamburger or a piece of cake.....or a mother effing cinnabon!!!

Yesterday I was a good friend, I drove two friends of mine to the airport.  They were talking about getting something to eat on their layover in Salt Lake.  I told them laughingly about how I used to make sure I flew Delta because there is a Cinnabon at the end of the Delta concourse, so no matter how short the time between flights I knew I could run down there and get one.  About two hours after dropping them off I get a picture of a HUGE cinnabon and a message saying ' I thought of you when I ate this'.  B*tch, what a b*tch.  I know she didn't do this to be mean and even a month ago I would have just laughed.  But now I dream not only about the doughy, gooey deliciousness of the Cinnabon, I dream about punching her in the face after I eat it.....ok not really.....well I did think about it, but I am not really the violent type.

So my fantasies about Cinnabon on top of my reduced swelling/restriction are making me angry and irritable.  I even looked up the calories of a Cinnabon...a mere 880!!  ONLY 880!!  Considering that is what I take in for an entire day right now, holy cracker jack! 

I go see my surgeon again on 05/02, I am hoping with all I have in me that I get a fill.  Even two weeks just seems soooooo long.

Puree in, equals puree out

Well I am rocking the purees, but my digestive system is not really loving it.  On Monday it was a one full months of liquids, so I think it might be protesting it a bit.  I spent a lot of the night in the potty and I will be working from home today so I don't need to worry about any shared restroom embarrassment at work.  Peaches also went to the store before work to pick up some flushable wipes, as my bum was hurting a bit.  I LOVE to work from home, I get wear yoga pants and tee shirts, multi-task with laundry and dishes and cuddle with my puupies and kitties during conference calls.

All went well yesterday with my Barium Swallow, everyone seemed pleased with the placement of the band.  My surgeon thinks I will be ready for a fill when I come in for my one month visit.

One thing I have not talked too much about is my goals, I don't really have a goal weight.  I know when I was in college and playing rugby I weighed 150-155, had a six pack and was pretty solid, but I just don't see that being where I want to be now.  After talking to my weight loss doctor I have picked a tentative number of 175, but will just wait until I feel good and stop I guess.  I do have one number and date in mind though, that is 190 by November 15th.  For Christmas this past year I got Peaches a 12 day trip to the Costa Rica (he has never been out of the country).  And a lot of the activities have a weight limit of 200 on them, so by the time we leave on Nov 15th I would like to be at least 190 (leaving some wiggle room) so I will be able to ride horses, zip line and parasail.

This post is kind of random, I know.  But I wanted to update everyone on my gym tour yesterday.  It was with Apex Personal Training and Fitness.  The owner and the two trainers I met were awesome, they realized that I have special nutritional needs and asked for more information on what that would be.  So instead of just trying to force their stuff on me, they wanted to learn about what my nutritionist suggests.  I did not feel one ounce of judgement for my weight or surgery and even felt a little excitement from them at 'getting their hands on me'!!  The gym is small, but has everything I might need.  I also got a new '10 pack' pass to the yoga studio in town that I love.  I still have two weeks before I am released for lifting over 10 lbs and serious working out, but I think I am ready for it!

Two different times I found myself just staring into my open fridge, prowling for something to eat.  Thankfully I didn't have anything too bad in the house, but if it had been there I think I would have shoved it all down!!  I am not really hungry, I just want food...in my mouth!  So the first time I went to the fridge, I did the laundry and wiped down my washer and dryer instead.  The second time I took two of my pups for a walk.  If I am conscience of it, I can catch the behavior and avert it, but sometimes it just sneaks up on me, then it's like nude mud wrestling to get it in line.  I just keep telling myself I am building new habits, and on those new habits I will build my new life.

Sweet, sweet purees....How I love thee

Let me count the ways:
1.     Variety
2.     I get to pretend chew
3.     Varitey

That about sums it up!! 

I had home made refried black beans and chicken, squished up avocado/lemon juice and Greek yogurt for dinner.  It was heaven!!  This morning I had a squished up banana and Greek yogurt, again heaven.  Now I am sure two weeks from now I will be b*tching about the puree stage, but for now I will revel in the bliss that it is. 

I am going to tour a gym right by my house tonight, they have a really cool 'full service' personal training program that I am all excited about!!  For my monthly fee I will get access to the gym, two session a week with my trainer, monthly body composition testing (letting me know my muscle mass vs fat mass), monthly health counseling sessions (where we go over nutrition, goals, lifestyle changes), monthly fitness assessments (cardio and flexibility), exercise assignments for the days I am not with my trainer and the rental of a body bug to track my calories burned and such.  My dad has even offered to pay for my first month to get me on track with my new lifestyle, so I am super excited.  I did have some apprehension about even looking for a trainer, I had a really bad interaction with my a trainer at my old gym.  He basically told me I was cheating and I disgusted him more for doing the surgery than for being fat.  So I emailed the owner of Apex Personal Training and just laid it out.  I am a morbidly obese woman, ready to get my life back.  I am willing to do the work and I have the added help of a Lapband.  Is there a trainer there that would be willing to help me on my journey, if not FINE but be honest.  I refuse to listen to BS.  He wrote me back and said they have several clients that had WLS and his philosophy is they will work as hard as me to get me where I want to be, but they will NEVER work harder than me.  So I set the pace.  I am super excited!!  Also Peaches can join too for just an additional $10 a month.

I came home to a surprise yesterday, Peaches got me a shirt with what will now be my new motto...

 I love the Muppets and I have been facing some hatin on the issue of my Lapband so it really rang home!!  He got it in a XXL, XL and a L, he is sooo adorable.